It’s gonna be 1500hrs in a few minutes. And I’m still not ‘snapping out of this unknown mood’.
MisterHubster’s at work. MiLittlestChica’s in school. Cheeky*NotSo*BabyMunster’s back from school. And me – still seated here with my lappie, a book to read, the iPhone by my side. But I still don’t feel so right. I get this way pretty often. Is there such a term for this moment?
So this idle mind started to wander off in cyberspace..
First stop: JohnChow.com – just had to see what this guy’s all about – since I have his book right in front of me now. I’m still curious and a lil skeptic in these blogging-making-money-lifestyle.
Then.. It lead me to Singapore Mom Bloggers – just to get a feel of what other SAHMs in Singapore been up to. Well.. I must say.. they’re all filled with Happy Smiley Nothing’s-Bringing-Me-Down kinda moments. Wow. And oh.. most of them are with kids below age 3.
Hmm.. So. What is so different about them and me? – perhaps they’re aren’t as moody as me? *lol* Oh.. they’re all doing some kinda PR thingy on their blog too – so i guess that’s where all the moolah started coming in.
Hmmm.. OK.. So.. as Anthony Robbins mentioned in his Unlimited Power audiobook – one need to have a (role) model in order to be a success in whatever their field of success is gonna be. Ermm.. Considering these mommas are all 1. Singaporeans 2. Mommas 3. Some SAHM 4. Running a money-making blogs about their lives as mommies and their own families — that pretty much covered what I’ve always been up to..
But.. the difference is – I Ain’t Super Shiny Happy People! – at least not at this moment.
I feel just like the Wonder Women up there – The Good Against The Other.
Or perhaps right this moment is just the ‘No Run = Cranky Mood’ Mode. I can go on and on and on – like I always do.. trying to figure out what’s this thing I’m going through at the moment for days and end up wasting my energy and effort.
*breathe in.. breathe out* Let’s restart one more time.
Here’s my New Story for Today:
“As much as I appreciate who I am, who I’ve been, what I’ve been through, I can sense a great sense of joy, accomplishment, abundance – all awaits me in the very near future. With all the experiences I have gained, I know I will be lead to the right sources for me to share it, explore it with and make the best out of my own potential.
All the experiences I’ve had the year before, are all to my benefit this year – for I am better equipped – emotionally, mentally and physically. I am not seeking perfection in myself for ‘I AM ENOUGH’ – at the right time, at the right moment.
I accept myself internally, whatever I can improve on, are all currently ‘Work In Progress’ and while I’m at it – I’m still able to find joy – in whatever moments that will come by.
I may feel like I’m the only weird one where I am right now *aka my own head* – but I know that I am as real, as authentic as I truly am.
So goodbye my worrisome mind.. my energy and my day will take a different turn once I click on the ‘Publish Post’ button. Cos really, I just don’t wish to feel this sluggish *especially mentally* for the rest of the day.. Cos really – I’m just not built like that anymore.”